The Weekend Noteworthies

Here's what I've been up to this week:

• Research. Tons of research! Because, you know, learning new stuff is really important.
• Creating new tarot spreads. Sometimes the ones you find in books just don't do the trick. 
• Spending way too much money on candle making supplies! But it's worth it because it's all for candles that'll be listed in the shop!
• I traded tarot readings for some really cool stones (pictured above)! I decided to offer readings for barter and some really cool things have come about because of it!

Aside from all the cool things I've had going on, it's been a worrisome week. My dog injured her foot while we were playing fetch. She landed badly after jumping and ripped her nail off on her back foot. Although the vet said she's going to be just fine, it clearly hurts her and she refuses to walk on it. I feel horrible for her!

For next week: I hope to have a few new things listed in the shop, and I'll be working on redesigning my Book of Shadows.

BTW, Fall Equinox is on Tuesday! May you enjoy the harvest and welcome in the changing of the seasons!

It's All In The Terminology (Aparently)

I was raised by my mom, who considers herself "not Christian, but spiritual." I grew up watching my mom explore the idea of a mother and a father god. She kept crystal geodes all over the house. She stressed the importance of candles and the meanings of their colors. She used a crystal pendulum and tarot deck to help her solve life's problems. She was a firm believer in herbalism and natural healing. She used salt to dispel negative energy. She was the one who taught me to use a tarot deck in the first place, and she strongly encouraged my highly intuitive abilities. All of this, while retaining a strong connection to the god of Christianity. My mom was, essentially, a Christian Witch (or christowitch).

The only thing is, she doesn't know this. She believes what she believes simply because it makes sense to her. That's it. Since before I can remember, she was always very involved in Christianity. She was outcast from her community, though when she expressed her interest in these non-traditional ideas that she believed in. So she continued her own path in solitude; continuing to believe in the Christian god while sticking to her guns about her non-traditional beliefs (like tarot, communicating with the dead, the power of candles and crystals, etc).

The only difference between her and I is that I decided to research these beliefs further. By pure accident, I discovered Wicca. From there, I learned about witchcraft. It was so eerie to read and hear how the beliefs of these "witches" lined up with my own beliefs so closely. I discovered that I had essentially been a witch my whole life, I just didn't know my practices by that name. My mom however, chooses to identify as "spiritual" because she has a very close relationship with her god and feels that is the best way she can disassociate herself with Christianity while still holding onto her relationship with her god.

Now, on to my point. She made a very disturbing comment to me on the phone today. She was checking out my shop (because she's always ordering tarot readings from me), and she apparently noticed for the first time that I refer to my practices as "witchcraft." She said "aren't you afraid you're going to attract the devil into your life by calling yourself a witch?"

I simply told her that I don't believe in the devil. The devil is an entity belonging to Christianity and I am not a Christan. I'm a Pagan, technically. This isn't news. This has been the case for years. I think she took that as a slight to her religion, though, because she got all snippy and said some more things about my practice being a potential magnet for evil and then abruptly ended the phone call.

Although it was rather short, this conversation has been bothering me a great deal ever since. First of all, I'm hurt. This comment came from my mom. This is the person who raised me and should know me better than anyone. She's the one who taught me many of the things I know now. She raised me to walk the path that I walk. I can't even kill a spider, and this woman thinks that I am dabbling in evil.

Secondly, I'm offended. We've had plenty of talks about religion before. She knows very well what I stand for, and I know what she stands for. We can easily find common ground among our (slightly) different religious/spiritual paths and respect each other when it comes to our differences. Or, so I thought. I had no idea that something as simple as terminology can make such a big difference in determining good from bad.

I see this as super hypocritical. Just five minutes earlier, she had been begging me for a tarot reading. I guess that's OK, as long as it's not called witchcraft. But as soon as it's witchcraft (which IT IS), then it's evil and the Christian devil will come find you even though you don't even subscribe to a religion that believes in the devil.

It's scary how deeply rooted religious ignorance can be. She doesn't even fully understand what witchcraft is. But because she was once told by someone (who also knows nothing of witchcraft) that witchcraft is associated with the devil, she believes it. So much so that she chose that idea (which is hearsay) over first-hand knowledge of who her own daughter is.

I'll be bothered by this for a while. I just had to get this off my chest since my mom pretty much hung up on me and didn't give me a chance to talk it out with her.

Thank goodness for blogs!

"So Mote It Be"

The phrase, "so mote it be" is popular among many witches, pagans, and Wiccans. It's widely used in spells and rituals as a closing statement, sort of an "amen." It is deeply rooted in Wiccan tradition, dating all the way back to Aleister Crowley and Gerald Gardner (who apparently borrowed the term from the Freemasons).

It was included in all of the books I used to teach myself the craft so, naturally, I adopted it myself. But nonetheless, I always felt funny using it in my spells. That one term seemed so out of place among everything else in all of my spells, like such an old phrase didn't belong as a conclusion to a spell that was otherwise written in the modern dialect that I am familiar with. I always felt uncomfortable using it and as a result, used it only half-heartedly.

But for me, that defeats the purpose of having it there in the first place. It's not just a conclusion, but a statement of power. By ending a spell like this, you are affirming to yourself and the universe that your words and intent have immense power. Because you will this spell into fruition, it will be so! That's why it was so important to me that I keep it in my spells instead of just scrapping it altogether. Without it my spells feel incomplete, like they stop abruptly and then just putter out.

I decided to tweak it so that it was something I was fully comfortable saying. It became "As is my will, so it will be." It is essentially the same phrase, and its meaning is exactly the same. I pretty much just got rid of the word 'mote.' No one in these modern times ever uses that word. Because of this, I feel that it just didn't have a place in my craft. I think that a witch's craft needs to be very personal and everything must mean something to the individual conducting the spell. Otherwise, it won't hold as much power.

Now, I can conclude my spells with complete confidence in the words that are coming out of my mouth. I am using words that I fully understand and am comfortable with, and that only enhances the potency of my intention.

This Witch's Rede: Laws of Balance

For the first few years of my study of witchcraft, I thought I was Wiccan. I read Wiccan books, studied up on gods, learned the Rede, and tried to find a tradition to place myself in. After a while, I realized that Wicca as a religion just isn't for me. In fact, religion and I just don't get along very well period, no matter what religion it is.

But I just couldn't give up witchcraft. A witch I am, and a witch I always will be! After all, you don't have to be Wiccan to be a witch, and you don't have to be a witch to be Wiccan either. So I decided to let go of Wicca and continue on with my practice of witchcraft.

Some people I know thought I was abandoning a light path for a dark one, so to speak. They thought I just wanted the witchcraft without any of the rules or guidance or accountability that (supposedly) comes along with being a part of a religion. But that's actually not true at all.

In fact, I'm a firm believer in karma. I've posted about it here before. Just because I don't worship a god who will punish me if I disobey him doesn't mean that I am not concerned with the consequences of my actions. I believe that there is a strong force out there that requires balance in all things. If you do something to upset that balance, such as intentionally cause harm to someone else, it will come back to you in some form in order to restore the balance that was tipped.

Even actions as simple as a small spell for attracting money. That money has to actually come from somewhere. Love spells are the same. Are you messing with someone else's free will in order to get something you selfishly want? That's going to cost you in the long run. Nothing is without consequences.

Some believe in the "rule of three," in which whatever you put out into the universe is going to come back to you three times. I'm not sure I believe it's quite that severe. That itself seems to be an upset in balance. Think of a scale full of pennies on each side. I tip the scale on my side because I want some of those pennies. What happens then? The scale certainly does not lean three times as heavy in the other direction. Balance is restored if an equal amount of weight is emptied from the other side.

This is my idea of a rede. I believe that the universe, or "karma," will find a way to restore all balances that were upset or otherwise messed with. Sometimes it's such a severe imbalance that it springs into action and knocks you on your ass. Other times it's a slow process and may not happen for a while. But it is always corrected eventually.

I'm quite sure that not all witches share this belief. Some don't live by any rules at all, while others have very strict rules they abide by. I may not worship a god, but I can certainly govern myself when it comes to right and wrong.

A Lucky Find!

I found this beauty while I was wandering around the otherwise deserted beaches of Folsom Lake this weekend. The BF and I took the dog for a game of fetch on the beach and some swim time. The area we chose was muddy and required hiking down a bit of a slope to get to it, so it wasn't really anyone else's idea of Memorial Day fun. It was perfect for us, though.

I nearly tripped over this rock while we were wandering around. It was almost completely buried in mud, but it stood out to me like it had been shining a flashlight in my eye. I picked it up, rinsed it off in the water, and spent the rest of the morning trying to convince my dog that it wasn't a ball to chase.

I think it's quartz. I know next to nothing about crystal and stone identification, but I do own a few pieces of quartz already and this looks pretty similar, although this is raw and mostly milky white with some swirls of pink and red thrown in.

In my own humble opinion, it's a gorgeous piece! Whatever it is, it's unlike anything I've ever seen before. I feel that it called me to it, like it was meant to end up in my hands. I'll be cleansing and charging it under the next full moon, and I look forward to discovering what kind of energies it will bring to my craft.